What memory do you have of an incident when your experienced bias, prejudice, and /or oppression, or witnessed someone else as the target of these things? Keep in mind that one can encounter such incidents in real contexts, including online environments, as well as in fictional ones, such as movies, books, TV shows, and the like.
This is something we do see all around us daily-even if we don’t want to admit it to ourselves. The time that stands out for me is shortly after I met my husband and we wanted one of his college friends to be the best man and his father was totally against it because the friend was African American. This was a friend that had been there for my husband over the course of their college years and after and we decided that we would stick to our choice and keep him as best man. In the end it did work out and my father in law was okay-but he had been raised in a time when it was normal for whites to treat others this way. My father in law did come around and start interacting with the friend and we still today have him as a close family friend.
In what ways did the specific bias, prejudice and/or oppression in that incident diminish equity?
The way that he was treated diminished equity because he was not treated as an equal, he was made to feel that even though he was a college graduate he didn’t know anything because of his color. He was a very knowledgeable person but made to feel the opposite.
What feelings did this incident bring up for you?
Being there to hear my father in law talk to someone this way was very difficult because I had been treated this way by others throughout my time in foster homes and girls homes, when you are the only one that is different-it seems like you stand out and people want to make you feel inferior to them. This was a very important friend of ours and it was not right for anyone to treat him this way.
What and/or who would have to change in order to turn this incident into an opportunity for greater equity?
This is a simple case of coming to terms with the age we live in and realizing that it’s not okay to treat another person differently just because they are from a different race or sex. I can remember having many talks with my father in law after this happened and over time he came to understand why we felt it wasn’t okay and that our friend would remain our friend no matter what. He never totally got over being racist, but he did become friends and interacted with our friends no matter what they looked like. My father in law was the person that needed to change and to some extent he did even though he had over forty years of believing he was right in how he treated others.
I believe that this example you gave, maybe not in the same way, but a similar manner happens a lot today. We have a mixed group in society that consists of those that were raised in a time where other races didn't mix and those that are being raised now where different races are mixed together frequently. While neither in the way they were brought up is wrong, we as educators need to strive to teach our students that just because someone is different than us does not mean it is okay to be rude or treat them harshly. Thank you for sharing.
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